How to make your partner feel involved in your pregnancy

Easy ways to enjoy the next nine months as a team
From the moment you see that second line appear on your pregnancy test, things change immeasurably for you. It’s impossible not to be aware of the little life growing inside you as you battle with morning sickness, find a new appreciation for naps, watch your bump grow, develop a weird love for pickles and feel those little flutters turn into proper kicks. But for your other half, things are a bit different. With no physical changes to contend with, it might all feel a bit distant and hard to grasp. But don’t worry – it’s really easy to make your partner feel involved and truly part of what’s happening. Here’s how…

Share the news together
Whether you decide to tell family and friends face-to face or opt for a cute announcement on social media, complete with scan photo and a pair of baby booties, make sure your partner is there to share in all the excitement and well wishes with you – in person or tagged in any online announcement.

Be app buddies
There are some amazing pregnancy apps out there, so why not find one which tracks your baby’s development, day-by-day, for both you and your partner to download? Together you can learn about how your baby is growing and what size fruit or vegetable it’s like ¬– cue some cute pet names for baby!

Go to appointments together
Easier said than done, but if there are appointments where you are allowed to bring your partner, make sure you do. It gives them a glimpse into what you’re experiencing and a chance to hear how you and the baby are doing, as well as ask any questions they might have. Current guidelines state you are allowed to bring a partner along to the 20-week scan (however please be aware these rules are changing constantly, and you must check with your local hospital trust first), so this offers a chance for your other half to see your baby on screen and hear the heartbeat. Something they will never forget.

Brainstorm baby names
Cosy up with a bumper baby names book and take turns firing off suggestions to one another. Some might be met with laughter, some a flat out ‘no!’, some might even get a ‘maybe…’, but even the process itself will bring you closer together and make the fact a baby is going to be there soon, feel very real! Tech-lovers should check out the BabyName app, for a fun, interactive way of choosing the perfect name you both love.

Sign up to classes
Antenatal classes are the perfect place to learn about pregnancy and labour, as well as to meet other parents-to-be. There are many free classes provided by the NHS, or you can opt for one of the paid-for courses run by the NCT – either way your other half will get to chat with other partners of mums-to-be, and you’ll both get to make new friends.

Read to bump
Create your own nightly ritual, where your partner reads to your baby every evening. After around 23 weeks, your baby can hear sounds outside of your womb, so encourage your other half to talk or read to your bump, so your baby can become familiar with their voice. The further along in your pregnancy you go, they might even be rewarded with a kick as baby responds to a familiar voice. It’s a beautiful way you can all bond as a family, even before baby is here.

Book a babymoon
It’s easy to get bogged down in the day-to-day stresses of life – and when you throw in all the extra jobs that need doing before baby arrives it might leave you wondering when you last had a decent conversation with your other half. Give them the job of booking a babymoon – whether it’s a night away at a fancy hotel or a long weekend in a countryside cottage. Use this time to relax, enjoy each other’s company and make memories together.

Pick the pram
Having an important job to do will automatically make your other half feel like they are helping out. Hand them the task of researching and choosing the perfect pram/car seat/crib – it will keep them busy, make them feel involved AND give you a break, a win all round!

Write a birth plan together
Labour is one thing your partner can’t do for you (typical!), but it doesn’t mean you can’t approach it as a team. Write your birth plan together, involving them in your choices so they know exactly what you are hoping for and what you need from them. Being informed will make your other half feel useful and empowered to help you have the most positive birthing experience. 

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